Overcoming Domestic Violence

Overcoming Domestic Violence

Overcoming Domestic Violence by Sarah Davis on this week’s find your voice episode with Aren Deu. #80

“Tales of broken chains”

Sarah Davis

A courageous woman who gives a platform for others to share their stories and her own, unapologetically Sarah Davis brings some joy into this episode. Having been in an abusive relationship Sarah found it difficult to find herself and voice due to the trauma it caused her. But now, an aspiring entrepreneur who hosts the Broken Chains Podcast Sarah is enjoying herself, loving herself and finding her voice.

An infectious personality as you will see from the YouTube version of this podcast, Sarah has come out the other side of adversity but as she states early on in this episode, you have to do it for you. You have to take control of your life, because nobody else can do it for you.

Let us know your thoughts and reach out to Sarah and follow her journey as I am sure you will find huge value from her.

Some Key Time stamps:

[06:15] Overcoming Abusive Relationships

[10:30] Finding your voice & purpose

[16:30] School systems are failing us

[23:20] Journaling is key

Free Audible book sign up: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Audible-Membership/dp/B00OPA2XFG?actionCode=AMN30DFT1Bk06604291990WX&tag=are86-21

Carol Dweck Mindset https://amzn.to/2QajMvZ

Amazon 5 Minute journal: https://amzn.to/31IJlGD

Support the podcast: https://www.patreon.com/findyourvoice

Links to me:

Website: https://www.arendeu.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aren.deu/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/arendeu

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/aren.singh

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aren-deu-65443a4b/

Podcast: https://www.findyourvoicepodcast.com

YouTube: http://tiny.cc/51lx6y

Links to Sarah:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brokenchainsradio/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SDavis14

Podcast: Broken Chains Radio

Transcript:

I want to help people who are in the situation but you can’t help anybody who’s not ready to help themselves welcome to an episode of find your voice a movement led by yours truly Aren Deu a guy who was overcome crippling anxiety adversity and difficulty like so many of you in life whose main goal now is to help you combat your excuses take control of your life write your own story and most importantly find your voice so now without further ado I welcome the host of the show himself Mr Aren Deu what’s going on people thank you for tuning into another episode off line your voice my name is Aren and his old ways I am the host of the show so today I bring on Serra Davis and this is one of the most enjoyable episodes I’ve ever recorded more so because of the amount that we both laughed now obviously conscious that I didn’t just want a whole episode of me and Sarah laughing back and forth I have made a few edits but the whole episode will be available on you cheap if you do want to see ourselves giggling along this episode which really took quite a few different courses but more importantly Serra’s message out side of this and the way that she does is very similar as well Sarah has our own podcast apart because that helps people share their stories gives them a platform to share their pay their adversity to hopefully inspire the people and also for your voice is about that’s what set this podcast up to give people a platform to give people a voice to be an advocate for people without a voice so it’s a very very exciting episode to drop it was really really fun recording it so without further ado I’m gonna jump straight to this episode in order once again thank every single one of you take time out of your day you spend a few moments for this listening to these episodes thank you so much okay I would like to welcome Serra Davis to today’s episode or find your voice Serra how you doing today I’m good thank you so it’s great to have you finally on the show is the second time now we trying very excited that you to share your story with the listeners because you’ve given me a bit about yourself and about what we have basically two today trying (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) it’s I I’m having one of ours are hard it does absolutely so I actually let yes yes plus the words over to you and let you listeners and we have a little bit about yourself and what brings you here today on find your voice I’m so about I don’t know ten years ago eleven years ago now when I was nineteen from nineteen to twenty two I was and that an abusive relationship so I am here and find your voice because I really think that it’s important for people to have awareness in this type of in this type of area you know and I think that a (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) domestic violence is very hush hush situation so for the past eleven years I’ve really been working on myself and self awareness and I finally gotten to a point where I can take that situation that I was in and out really bring a platform to it you know I have the podcast now myself and I have different people who are coming to me I’m starting to put support groups together (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) actually should Congress groups but yeah I just think that it’s important to bring this sort of situation a light string here absolutely and that is the power of sharing our stories so one of the things I try and encourage as many people as possible I’m fine your voice is to show you store your stories not Monday you don’t need to have the worst kind of advice to you could just let you be inside in the form of a struggle to get out of bed I mean for everyone especially the first almonds I hit says it’s it’s horrible it’s traumatic it’s really something that we struggle with but we always think that it’s Monday to talk about that when nobody else is going through and it’s exclusive to us now your thing obviously the D. B. C. relation ship thing having a pot for my your podcast and now share and I’m sure the so many people I’m talking both sexes as well the experience yeah not so if so could you just maybe dive a little bit into that so what is a podcast for anyone this this thing that may want to reach out and listen to that so I created the platform because I myself like I said I was about ten or eleven years ago when I was in the situation and I actually didn’t come out about it and so a year ago so nobody really knew and I always felt like I had to sort of figure the things out by myself (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) so I created the podcast broken genes radio because I wanted to give people a platform to share their stories and like you have said so many times in your show find your voice sharing stories is right really resonates with you know and and that having a commonality in the struggles so I really wanted to provide that platform where people can share their stories people can get inspired get courage and reach out if they feel the need to and even if it’s arm one person that I am reaching that’s enough for me because I think that it’s it’s about taking the small steps to gain the bigger goals and I will hopefully I’m going to provide that for people so (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) city so it’s broken chains radio for anyone that’s interested obvious up with the initial notes as well I am what one thing that you touched on there which is really important is something I was always such a run a blog about a stock the importance of open open sharing your story what you have to do is face lease quite empowering and it’s nice to get off your head one of your call we three but secondly it opens you up for support as well so what you can actually find is when I start find your voice not these incredible guest commercial in the shared stories of being in child at drug addiction kinds and all these mod mod vesti stories yeah mine was just about point in Saudi and I never really mentioned much about myself the mouth he put that reached out to me as life fundamentals from anxiety and I thought again really like I got this incredible story had a lot no but we get the insight you thing in most of my list is reach out to me because of that so what I want to ask you then be more specific in terms of the stuff that you’ve been through how did you get out of it no no you said you only just light open and find your voice in the last year for what kind of tips or tricks so would you recommend to somebody maybe going through an abusive relationship now that could help them overcome it but I don’t deny support I guess you could say my big thing was so I’m a I’m a spiritual person (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) and I I believe that god puts certain people in your life at certain points at certain turning points right so for me and my best friend who has knows more about me who has sought me at the worst of my worst who helped me realize that (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) the situation that I was in was on healthy I allowed that in some my life and I do cut him off because a lot of times when you’re going through this type of situation right you can feel so alone and so by yourself because you have pushed everybody else away your push everybody else out of your life and it might not a ban on like an awareness choice is just something that kind of happens you isolate yourself right so you have to allow people and be open to people coming and helping you and taking feedback feedback is so important it’s not an attack I mean I think that some people think that feedback can be an attack on their character an attack on what they’ve been through and it’s not if you are open to feedback and you’re open to people coming into your life and helping you and guiding you that will really change and that will really give it your your the way that you see certain things but you have to be open to it you know I I think that I want to help people who are in the situation but you can’t help anybody who’s not ready to help themselves so my platform is really geared towards the people who are in this situation but recognize that they’re ready to get out of it or the people who are already out of it and they’re like okay I’m gonna get some was done yeah from people who have been in this situation right and be open to that absolutely I love god and great point at the end you need to be able to you want to come out of yourself and don’t need to be you your desire me because they wore the most amazing things on this episode (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) through books or podcasts but you have to want it yourself so just to recap that then so the first point is don’t deny support and I know how easy is I’ve heard stories of our guests on the show who have done the exact opposite to that they’re trying to push everyone away but that that was their own conscious store so weather is actually the abuse at making that happen and the second one is obviously feedback is not gonna talk I think that’s a pretty employees all because so often as human beings I know myself if you ask me when I was twenty five long time ago I’m what’s feedback like outlook I would hate to other would be crazy eyes on what somebody telling me yeah I’m doing it wrong so we have to kind of drop the ego especially for me for the allies in retail as well so you podcast not your helping people having come from a place on the dais T. to not go through the same things he just software obviously come on the other side I also know you’re an entrepreneur is also is reading your tagline and thing I liked about it was you’re inspiring entrepreneur on a journey toward success in the way that you view it yes and I love that because the tagline to this is find your voice and white your own story and that’s one thing I always encourage people as we go through life and whether it’s your teachers with the ritual parishes policies or your siblings don’t tell you what they think you should do and so often the house in a massive effect on this growing up for the past twenty five years of my life was taken off stuff just to make my parents happy and it’s only now I’m doing the things that made me happy I could easily have stayed in London in a call of a job and in one of the books but instead I choose to say my office here on a podcast beacon to people or policy like a living and I absolutely love it because that’s that’s what does my heart that gives people hope when people hear the story so what do you do like on a daily basis plus entrepreneurial side to you tell us a little bit more about yourself okay so I’m my path to entrepreneurial lifestyle rate I’ve done so many different things and I think that this is important for people to understand too when you’re really finding your voice and finding your passion you can not limit yourself and think that okay I just have to do this and it’s just going to come to me one day like no I’ve tried I’ve had so many different jobs I don’t like the past ten years in my twenties I just like what from like corporate like did all the things real estate I know you do realize that I did all of the things in order for me to find that one thing that I really really lights a fire inside of me right so I think that a part of being able to find that is putting yourself in uncomfortable situations right so about a year ago in twenty eighteen when I came up with the idea for the podcast and coming out about domestic abuse and all of the things I went to a (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) a conference I guess you could call it called life on fire I think that you know who Ty Lopez’s so I was doing a course through tie Lopez and the gentleman’s name in the course of his neck arms were and he actually hosts a (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) a conference in Carlsbad California so I went there and when I was there I started listening to you know the speakers I started watching them like the way that they have this passion about their own story in the way that they moved across the stage in the way that they just presented themselves and then I was watching it you know the people in the audience I’m a very aware person so I was watching the people in the audience in the way that they were reacting in all of the things and then I was like fuck I wanted to make I want to do that I want to have I want to be able to bring out that late in somebody’s eyes so for myself I went from there to coming up with the podcast I had gotten a coach I (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) have done public speaking events I know that you stated that you don Toastmasters I joined Toastmasters I’m gonna start doing an improv class because I really want to do public speaking and then (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) on that note to I really want to write a book you know I think that a part of the story that I have I think it’s very important and crucial for people to have a book to really reference and really go to and identify with so along with that and all of dreams and visions I am doing I’m selling things online too you know I watch I watch Gary V. and he’s like what a TJ Max I’m like I’m their brother get it done well I love that I love the and the beginning of that so when you said something I was the only got this is my life in a nut shell where you said you do so many different things and when I look back at my CV I mean it’s so random some of the stuff I’ve done I’m for somebody on the outside they probably look at me and this guy just lost but I genuinely was when I connect the dots back now finding my way I was finding my voice in terms of what what to do so alright from corporate into boxing box was it was like a dream I want to do and I went to press on trying so health and fitness is that you are offered by as you can see on this site overhead how about the business side on this site so everything was kind of common to where I am today well in terms of finding my voice like the Toastmasters had a significant impact having children not confirm the caste system as my siblings not help me you always want to be of service and then be advocate for people that don’t have a voice so for anyone who may be going through that I maybe residents with a story where we’re doing so many different things from construction to you what what ever is don’t beat yourself up about it you do not need to necessarily know your purpose just because your neighbor or your parents know your purpose even in white and take you to the age of seventy right you but providing you keep trying and you put yourself in uncomfortable positions like you’ve done to known to be just awful that’s really really important lesson yeah and who knows what they’re what they’re purposes that twenty like come on get real is nobody knows what they’re purposes at twenty years old I’m sorry but I mean you have I should take that back retraction of words there are people like Bill Gates and Warren Buffett and all of the things who are like a unicorn and knew what they wanted to do at a certain age but nobody really an average person doesn’t know what it is that they want to do so you can not be scared to try all of the things I think that society puts this weird aspect on if you go from here to here here here here but we’re in an era where you’re allowed to do that you can do that and you should it yeah absolutely and office I think it’s just a scoring system is also yeah you’re you’re almost Howard okay you’re going to choose these subjects head because you’re gonna conduct our dentist or whatever it is and that’s it you might not even know what the job entails it might not along to your values your moral compass and you just do it one for me because of the paper to you subject your grades and I just think it’s a very very dangerous place and I was very fortunate to have come by the academic route so I had the choice I had the choice to choose you are want to go down degrees at the master’s but then I was like I think you should buy any of that I just wanna do you meet I want to do the things that made me happy it’s not making tons of money is making tons of tempat and I’ll take that and also the bat right night so that’s why I encourage people as well I mean I’m not tellin every single press to be a podcast for example who you got to go out there be of service I’m saying just do what’s in your heart with figuring out along the way and there’s nothing wrong with that there’s nothing wrong with not knowing what to do right and I think that because you have brought up school systems to I think that hopefully where in this might be a little bit off track but I eight think that hopefully with our society the way that it’s evolving you brought up ask athletes and stuff like that when you look at certain athletes they were in situations where they were able to hone in on that skill as a younger person right so with our school systems today I don’t think they really they do not cater to finding your skill you know they cater to here’s history here’s this here’s that out and all of the and you can learn from history I totally understand but that’s not helping society (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) have these renaissance people which is what we’re gonna start meeting with the way that technology is going right so if you have and I’m and I’m saying this for pure like I have nieces and nephew nephews and like I am a stickler on it my niece is very good at building things she has a mind where she like puts legos together and that’s what gets her going she likes being outside she likes doing these things so I’m a stickler on having that a part of her process a part of her growing because that’s where she’s gonna get her skills and her passion from as a young kid absolutely absolutely and going back to the school system are gonna end up talking about the school system by the way for the next but the point is is that is one thing I recognized because you could be doing a drug fiend history for example and if you’re very good at his street one of the set and you’ll be pushed towards the history Russo sometimes how you react in terms of exams are just too and I couldn’t yeah what almost instantly push you away there’s no telling that you might be the best person a drug free if you just a credit or you just had a different method of teaching is also sometimes there’s a lot of gifts and stuff that you miss out so size was something I struggled on massively and tell I associate it with health so when I got it right with the house stuff I’m fascinated by size some continuously landing about science where is that school you teach me about the human body all kinds of stuff I want to know anything about it because I had no interest in it so it’s very difficult as kids and I’m not here to just we’re not in the school system but I just think this all much more in the road and I as we are moving forward we just need to be conscious of that with obviously the younger generation yeah I almost good or not right let’s let’s so one of the things I always ask my guess is about routine and the reason I ask a question about routine is because I believe we are creatures of habit and sometimes we get celebs X. success or whether we change our mind so we just develop as people is normally done to certain things that we do on a daily basis now I ask everyone this question because I want listeners to not have to actually copy everything that’s ever does for example everything the island but to maybe think actually that’s really interesting maybe I’ll take that role Serra said this is ours said this Tom said this maybe I should just try that so dive into a little bit about you I know daily life what kind of things do you do for like a daily routine I well I always have some form of exercise and meditation now I wasn’t always like this and actually my routine around fitness has evolved I really think that sometimes we need to understand that what we what we should be doing should also be catering to where we are in our life right so about a year ago I was really big into boxing I love boxing I was really big into lifting heavy weights because my personal trainer was the strongman competitor right so he really put that into me so I was always pushing my muscles in my body to the Max and then six months ago I was brought down to my most humble beginnings right so I was like pretty much stripped of all of the things and I just did yoga because that’s what my my time and my body called for yoga and meditation so that’s where I am now I’m in a really reflective state so that is something that I do you currently so yoga and meditation I’m constantly journaling I have a and I don’t have it in front of me (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) but it’s called the five minute journal I have that and it’s all about gratitude I do that in the morning and then I also I read it the buy well all I have and then from there I just plain out my day you know I don’t I’m not a stickler on my morning routine because I was someone who had a power hour and it served me at that time but right now it’s not serving me I’m doing the things that are serving me your living intentionally basically into that way your your life nothing awesome really really important point is also especially the exercise I can relate to that person training been doing that for about eight years just as a as a sideline ventured I just really enjoy it I’m one thing I notice as well with the exercises mark off topic just ever so slightly but the same types of exercise that have a certain level of effectiveness for example when you lift heavy weights you have a feeling off I feel powerful office strong where is when you have a fee when you start doing yoga and I’ve done a bit of yoga block teas and stuff it’s more of a a mind for this kind of phase as well so I do that as well I go in and out of different phase I’m done how are lifted to bodybuilding to just call the (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) just complete order book on and I’m just a mile zone so there’s no right or wrong for everyone well I think just doing some level of exercise on a daily basis obviously for like the endorphins and all that great yeah it’s very good for you absolutely one hundred percent recommend not I think the five minute jailing of just made a note here I think that’s really interesting so I’m just by Jenny myself in the last week I am I right I would too speechless all I’m very high on like the street just off on fascinated by it and this is gonna be almost run about this (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) by the way from schooling to spiritualist all your lock up publicar UN anyway and I think she said about me so she recognize I have a lot of nervous energy mines I and stuff and she was like how are you coping because I have like a thousand ideas in my head on a daily basis and I’m always thinking of stuff but I never write it down and she’s recommended me to have like a brain books so every night now I just get everything from here down to a friend is a hell of a lot of stuff there because I need yeah and all right that and then the morning I kind of do it again but I don’t necessarily have a structure for it the days are do it I feel bad well I don’t do it with the times I’m not saying it’s an impact it bought it massively massively helpful one space on in terms of when problems hit me that day it’s not not problem get an ID to a cluster of shit open half yes it’s not clear here so it really helps me so this five minute Jennifer just expand never so it’s like I’m not is not like a a book that you just buy from Amazon was some but you’ve invented yourself it’s no it’s literally I feel like I should have in front of me but I don’t (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) it’s you can bite off Amazon literally called the five minute journal has a quote for the day and then they have weekly challenges and then it you just write down (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) what you’re grateful for you write down your daily affirmation and three things that you would make the day great pretty much and to expand on your (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) journaling at night if anybody on here because this is going to be around them so if anybody on here has trouble sleeping at night because of all of the things that are happening inside of their brain journaling and night takes those those healthy points and you get them down but then if you also do like ten minutes of meditation afterwards you’re going to sleep like a fucking baby like for real and a and actually because I was listening I’m not sure what his name was I was listening to one of the episodes where he talked about you have to be in a certain type of state to be able to do affirmations so if you’re writing these things down and you’re meditating afterwards and you’re sort of doing like an overall affirmation meditation before you go to sleep it’s gonna help tremendously absolutely up surreal that was that Nick Davis on now and the last episode Monday about this is just the Jack I’m and it makes a lot of sense all I’ve done got you journals for like years and most of the time it just becomes a habit that’s right the same stuff as yesterday just to kind of have done it yeah size doesn’t nothing happens there is not one that online okay I really need to have a think about the days of what actually I’m really grateful for I’m great for that yesterday for example we thought the boiler was on the on the blink and it was a turning on and I got my D. I. Y. skills which are very limited by the way are you can go and I was (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) give us paying around and come back on us thank god it’s not freezing so little things like that it made me feel grateful for having heat in the house ways if I just wrote it it wouldn’t necessarily mean the same thing so yeah I think that’s a great great point thank you for sharing that I’m gonna try to jump back into our episode nine I am so who are going to jump on your story Serra and all this adversity is some of your stories not one of your stories of all it’s a chapter of you of your book shall we say in your mama’s emerged as to when you were going through the B. C. relationships I don’t adopt too much into that but what I wanna do is extract maybe the lessons that you learned from not whether that’s about yourself (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) what you think if you knew now going back into that space where how bout you I serve my mantra is it’s pretty much the day that you let somebody else decide your own self worth is the day that you settle and I go on that all the time I think that understanding that other people’s perception of you is just other people’s perception of you and that’s just what it is but when you hold too tight so that you can really damage the way that you look in the mirror so self perception one self awareness is absolutely key along with (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) you know being able to come out of tough situations and make them something that is going to benefit you you have to be self aware and you have to be self aware and the way that you hold yourself the way that you speak to yourself the way that you speak to other people you know and and I just think that that’s you know I’m losing track of my thought I’m sorry it’s funny you find you remind me of myself I sometimes start talking and I’m not what was I talking about (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) is a crisis of tennis until right why did I even talk about that this you know and it’s absolutely fine so Serra than in this besides time that haven’t been through what you’ve been through and with only your experience and haven’t been to invest T. what’s your biggest fear (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) my biggest fear how shit I don’t know probably settling feeling like I’m settling for something that I know is not serving me I I I have like a huge thing and I take and it’s actually something that is not you know healthy for certain relationships that I have because I’m constantly lake MI settling in this am I doing this because it’s easy am I doing this because it’s (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) something that I feel like is serving me right now but in the long run it’s not going to so settling is a big thing for me and I think that that stems from being in an abusive relationship you know because I was settling and not so it’s kind of carried over and that’s something that I still have to work on with it myself but that’s again that’s for self awareness comes in like it not all of us are nobody ever has everything all figured out nobody ever has all of the things going on right so being self aware of the things that are not necessarily rates are serving you at that point in time you have to understand that but you have to be patient with yourself too patience is key absolutely yeah we’re in such a we’re in a society where you know everything is right now everything is just you know you go online and you have all the information so we feel like as for growing as a person and as we’re coming out of the struggles that’s the way that we should react to it to (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) but in reality it takes us a long time to evolve and change and we have to be patient with ourselves in doing so and the same thing in business if you’re hearing your business minded person you know business success does not happen overnight and we have such as you know thing where all we see is the end result we don’t see the middle the middle is like the Jews you know like I said ten years ago I was in the situation ten years I only what came out about a year ago you know and here I am all that time in between it was self growth and self awareness and and take ing I action behind what I was doing and the things that I was reacting to all of the answers so there’s a couple of points is when I point out that so I was fine ignorance being a play so the more self aware and will pass a development we do you almost realize how little you know and how far you still have to grow so sometimes I sit there and think oh my god as a twenty five year old when I was making corporate and I wasn’t doing any pass a development I didn’t even know what a book was I never read anything I thought my life a figure out another this is fine you know any money I was buying clothes buying college do whatever I want to do Dennis I get a nice plot and you go through a bit wet initially you landing stuff anything on this interesting then you go on a steep okay then when you get to about here what happens is if they can really help us you don’t know nothing at all even though you’ve probably grown three four five different yes and also was very interesting but you said a lot of good points there in terms of its the bit in between is that growth but that’s the most most important thing an online with seeing the end result was seen the girl we not the story effectively and not something that I always try and tell people that don’t just listen or accept what’s on Instagram because some days you’re not even seen the end result using a fake result using opera section you seem people claim to be doing ex wives at a what happens is comprises already about thing in life you compare yourself with somebody do well but imagine comparing yourself as someone who actually is it through well but a fabricated the results to keep them back you’re putting yourself in a very difficult position especially if that promise in that you can become an overnight success (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) financially for you within twelve months to send you all these dreams to make sure that their line their pockets is also it’s a scary place so it takes time it takes everything that you’ve just said Pennsylvania’s growth I think you coming out now with your story and your podcast you give so much more value than somebody who just lets she sits there reads about it and then we’re good to take the information which I see a hell of a lot of his all that’s one of the reason for your voice I will talk about my advice to you and then I need people like yourself to share yours so if there is anyone going through this there’s no point speaking to me is bad to speak to someone about yourself because you can help him so yes of course I think something that you know will help too and I had to learn this with the whole comparison thing and growing is you have to be super selective on who you watch and who you follow like this is it I don’t think that people understand because the amount of information that we take and is so great you have to be very aware of and selective on who you’re taking that information from so if you’re on Instagram like and I don’t know how people are going to take this but I literally follow a high I think like a hundred people maybe seventy five people and these are people that I follow for specific reasons because I get certain things from them that help me you know think about where I am and I will also help me at motivate myself at the same time so if you’re listening to this and you’re like well how am I supposed to know I will tell you Gary V. is a one is like we’re number one start there and then you will grow out from there because he you have to find people who squash the bullshit that you have within yourself and huge on self awareness I think that it is something that helps us get out of tough situations and out of you know difficult struggles and I think that certain people help us do that and I think he is definitely one of them if you’re looking for someone to follow not city of see I love Gary stuff it’s literally no bullshit basically no B. S. we’re gonna segment and Serra into what I call the phone part of the show and this is a possible at sixty to ninety seconds I’m gonna ask you the most random questions okay we’re gonna go in three two one okay Sir what is your favorite hobby writing your biggest mistake last year the not building foundations your participation with starting my podcast your favorite motivational speaker TD Jakes and time and Michael Todd if you had an extra hour day how would you spend researching the best lesson anyone has ever told never settle if you can get the listeners to practice one thing to benefit their mind set with a life forward after today what would it be daily self awareness if you could abolish one thing in the world self judgment your favorite book I eat pray love your favorite color purple like a dark purple like almost like a blacks are and it is best mostly by specific it’s in my head it’s all got it does that if you could sit with one person dead or alive for now that he would be I. G. Hepburn the number one thing that annoys you okay not listening lack of listening skills and lack of communication your favorite food a pastor in wine nice combination yeah your favorite place in the world Ireland I’m finally what song best describes your life (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) it I have no idea well no worries song that best describes my life holy shit (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) it have to be like some sort of workers strips on I really like orchestra music which is so random but something like that I can’t think of the specifics on the on okay but we have finished the phone part of the show and now as we head towards the end of the show about two more questions if I may Serra so the first one is about reflection on hindsight is a wonderful thing obviously he teaches us ways to get to where we are quick at easier and less heartache but the Jenny teaches a solo so much as well so now when everything that you know now we don’t have your knowledge was in your experience that you’ve been through in your life if you could go back to a younger Serra just whisper something in it is about her future what would you say just one thing (Subscribe to find your voice podcast – Overcoming domestic violence) can I do to you can do to I you are enough you are worth it well there’s it it’s going to be three your worst fit and keep the simple things simple and the final question then which is about legacy so if in a hundred fifty years time signs vows to save us and all that exists is a book and this book is about use about your life’s about the amazing wonderful things that you’ve done and a cheat firstly what would the title be and secondly what were the some of the back tell us about you the title would be here tales of broken chains which is actually my hash tag on IT anyone cares of and the summary on the background would be a woman who gave a platform for other people to share their stories and in turn share her story and unapologetic way that’s all it would say so before I give you a chance to obviously that the this is not how they can find you how they can still Q. maybe hopefully you’ll follow them back and let him into your life is all you’re very selective on the people that you just follow is there any questions or is there anything else you want to leave the audience with or you had wished I had asked you no I think this is that is what it’s meant to be so it’s good no more questions posted why is the best place people could connect with you I see you can follow me on Instagram at broken genes radio or you can try my personal page but I’m super selective on that but as firing Sir D. that has more like my everyday life reckon jeans radio the podcast itself but yeah that’s how you can stalk me well certainly everyone who is this man I use maybe been through either an abusive relationship or just he wants to follow somebody who’s authentic and sharing her message somebody else he’s given up pot full for people as well because that’s kind of what phone your voice does as well but this is the only podcast out there Sir is messages may resonate more with you so if that is the case please do go over and check out broken chains radio or those things in the show notes or not thank you Sarah for your time today or thanks for doing your hair is all I didn’t know if say look yeah but I funny thank you for doing that I’m forever unless a whole thank you for listening thank you for having me as fun and remember this podcast is absolutely free so all we ask in return is for you to share this with a friend and drop us a five star review over on iTunes have an awesome day

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