Grow Your Confidence & Avoid Imposter Syndrome

Grow Your Confidence & Avoid Imposter Syndrome

Grow Your Confidence & Avoid Imposter Syndrome, to truly find your voice.

“You don’t need to have it all figured out, you just need to realise your strengths, trust your gut & take action”

Betitina Árnafjall

Bettina openly states the following:

“It’s my heart’s desire to share the many experiences I made in my eight years as a team manager to help all you women out there to avoid mistakes, change your mindset and behaviour and take your career to the next level” and through this fascinating discussion you can see exactly why.

Suffering with confidence issues throughout her own life, imposter syndrome and never really having it all figured out she continued to pursue her desire and develop her passion into serving others. Recognising that none of us have it all figured out, and we all have our doubts and moments of uncertainty she still persevered. She also recognised it was her action and commitment to the process that allowed her to achieve the results she is achieving today.

Her specialities include:

  • Confidence is key for your career
  • Don’t confuse loyalty and a false sense of duty
  • Your career doesn’t need to be a “career”
  • The top 5 job search Dos and Don’ts
  • Top 5 things to promote your career as a woman
  • Are there unsuitable jobs for women?
  • The gender gap – a team manager’s perspective
  • How not to get paid less as a woman
  • How to research a realistic salary
  • Salary negotiation tips
  • How to get a raise

This was a fascinating conversation and fortunately we managed to get it recorded this time around.

Some Key Time stamps:

[02:50] Bettina’s own struggles with confidence

[07:30] Doing things even when you aren’t sure

[11:50] My own imposter syndrome with podcasting

[23:35] Migraines ruining Bettina’s life

[29:50] Fun part of the show

[33:00] Bettinas final message – How to be successful without a master plan

I urge you all to follow her journey & check out our new sponsor: https://www.healthxcel.co.uk

Free Audible book sign up: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Audible-Membership/dp/B00OPA2XFG?actionCode=AMN30DFT1Bk06604291990WX&tag=are86-21

Carol Dweck Mindset https://amzn.to/2QajMvZ

Amazon 5 Minute journal: https://amzn.to/31IJlGD

Support the podcast: https://www.patreon.com/findyourvoice

Links to me:

Website: https://www.arendeu.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aren.deu/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/arendeu

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/aren.singh

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aren-deu-65443a4b/

Podcast: https://www.findyourvoicepodcast.com

YouTube: http://tiny.cc/51lx6y

Links to Bettina:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/womenscareerlift/

Website : https://www.womenscareerlift.com/resume-online-course

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Transcript:

welcome to an episode of find your voice a movement led by yours truly Aren Deu a guy who was overcome crippling anxiety adversity and difficulty like so many of you in life whose main goal now is to help you combat your excuses take control of your life write your own story and most importantly find your voice so now without further ado I welcome the host of the show himself Mr Aren Deu what’s going on everyone thank you for tuning in to another episode of find your voice my name is R. N. and as always I am the host of the show so I’m delighted to be able to bring to you patina on today’s episode of find your voice now this is actually the second time about to get her back because unfortunately me being an absolute nobody got the technical stuff wrong ended the recording just wasn’t great but plus a hot she managed to get as often you microphone and now we are ready to drop some incredible knowledge in this amazing episodes office Lee before I begin Bettina how we doing today very good thanks I’m very happy to be here again what what is what time it works out absolutely yeah I’ve not managed a third attempt so hopefully this is the one not to go straight thank you for your patience with this so before we begin I I know the way that you’re doing today and I think it’s really admirable in terms of what you’re doing because you’re helping women overcome their confidence in the workplace and effectively finding their voice in order to get what they deserve and I love the I love that there is a clear distinct mission behind what you’re doing but before we jump into the and some of the areas that I want to touch on for the listeners who I feel may gain great insights from tell us about yourself tell us what you got you to where you are today because it’s quite an niece type of job that you’re actually doing so tell us about Bettina growing up maybe some of the things in your life what made you actually get to where you are today please so I mean the topic of confidence also has been the topic for me in my time growing up (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) despite you know me being good at many things also at school and so on I often had the feeling that I was not good enough for it could still do it better you know I had this kind of perfectionist vision of who I should be I’m so (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) for a long time also as it is a teenager I have been struggling with with confidence M. but you know really believing in what I can do I’m one thing that helped me so far (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) always was that (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) despite me being afraid of doing something or like you have a feeling that I’m not quite ready for it usually I’m the feeling of boredom and just being stuck with something that I didn’t like was always stronger so it always kind of pushed me to to do the things anyway despite I didn’t really feel ready but I had a lot of sleepless nights over my career development so (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) I started out basically studying languages at university and then (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) had some job to customers the customer service and before I got amounted to be a team manager in customer service and this was also a point where you know I knew that I I was unhappy with my previous job and I needed to do something more I needed to be more challenged (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) but I was so scared and so not ready yet (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) to beauty manager of like twenty people dead I was part of the team so this was one of the points where I was reading the (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) struggling with with confidence as well but again you know did the kind of the pain of being stuck in my other job and and being bored there was greater so I kind of threw myself into it and then just learned everything on the job fantastic so that’s quite interesting because for somebody who’s not helping other people overcome their confidence to head the actually at one stage in your life you actually struggled with the confidence although I’m glad you were open and honest about that because I’m sure there’s many people listen to United thinking well it’s probably okay for her because she’s confident naturally but you got to work on the ally and you mentioned not it’s the fear of boredom and being stuck the actually outweighed the fear of just being afraid and that’s really interesting because I think most often or not we don’t do things in life because the fear of embarrassment or the fear of failure but if we can just change that maybe refrain that to something that’s a little bit more important than become feel the fear and do it anyway and when I was doing a bit of research into some of the work you do I think you said that as well in terms of it’s not about the absence of fat it’s just about feeling it but then doing it anyway not something that you’ve obviously demonstrate yourself so for the listeners not listening thinking okay this lady she’s done incredible she’s overcome a fish English obviously as you mentioned I think on the last episode that we did was it your first language so it’s incredible that you have even the confidence to speak N. not your natural language on a podcast dot this dot makes me feel embarrassed because I sometimes lack confidence even when I’m doing my own podcast so kudos to you for that thanks come me neither then maybe dive into you in terms of like on a mindset bases and understand how you develop that comfort is what were the things that maybe the turning points in your life where yes I know the fear of being stuck was one thing but did you have any hobbies do you have any trace on a daily basis that maybe you thought if I can just work on this or if I can perfect this the my confidence will start to improve so I mean I I still have phases where I’m struggling for confidence so this is not that I am always perfect and super confident but it’s just like he’s struggling in different areas or what was different aspects that sake not like that I’m I had a time where I was generally like not and the great place in my life (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) there was a lot of trouble with my dad being six going on so I was generally not in a good place and during this time I felt not confident at all to take on additional responsibilities or additional and you roll they actually offered me a new role in the and my current company and they said yeah you would be great and I just just didn’t feel at all confident to do it but yeah I in this case I knew that if I say no and they will probably not offer me something again so there I had a choice between being stuck again and just trying to do it but you know and then I said OK whatever I do not feel ready for this right now but I’m going to do it anyway I am I told them so I told them that I was not sure that I could do it they said they wish what I could do it so I said okay I will trust them I will trust them because maybe they see something in me that I could not see at this point (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) but from this point onwards basically it kind of opened up my mind to you know being more open and more interested in in experiencing new things so what (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) I actually started listening to podcasts which has been a major game changer for me (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) because let’s just hearing other people talking about how they struggle and how how they also dealt and that I’m not the only person in the world who studies my competence is you know I mean that everybody’s actually that’s in this was completely like crazy to me you know I before I did not realize that everybody’s doubting and everybody suffers from imposter syndrome at some point so I I had the feeling like I was kind of weird because I was feeling that way so that helped me a lot to just realize that I’m not weird order or different the end that everybody feels like that at some point I also (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) started doing M. S. that into (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) journaling basically so I I bought this a five minute journal and am this really happy because it really helps you to set a positive mindset and to focus on the positive things that happened rather than on the negative things that usually runs through your mind all the time and so I started doing this about two years ago and I’m still doing it everyday and I think it really helps because it really helps you to refocus and especially in times when your confidence is low over you just generally feel a bit you know low in energy and so on you it still helps you to you know focus on positive things if I may just quickly recap some of that then so too the main things was podcasting and journaling and the reason I’m gonna choose both of those is because basically find your voice the reason I interview people like yourself people who have been through adversity (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) people who have openly shared their journey and the struggles is because I want listeners to recognize that their problems on it screws into themselves that’s not where it high you maybe thought you a one day or how well I thought I was wait as a guy who suffer with anxiety so it’s really important that we recognize that every single person just as you pointed out suffers with diets every single person has bad days every single person has those moments where they call figure it out with the not understanding what to do next and I think it’s really important that we be transparent without because so often in life was seeing stuff that is almost a path that life or a path it has to do in the the most amazing incredible things and never really having that moment of adversity or struggle so I’m really grateful you said that I think that’s a really really important thing and then secondly you mentioned the jailing as well I Jenny is something I’ll watch you start doing myself very recently and you mentioned the five minute journal which I actually put in order the show notes for the show because it’s one of the best things that you can do especially for myself suffer with anxiety so when I general I get all of the stuff in my head that’s going on twenty four seven and I put it down on a piece of paper and one calls me dying too I can look at the positives and three it gives me a way of working out solutions where is when it’s all in our head we often struggle with not so much so it’s great that you have mentioned two of those things two things I actually do myself well just being fully transparent I think that’s brilliant because you’re not saying I teach confidence I am the most competent has never you’ll say look I still have these days but what I do is I try and make sure my days have certain habits that enhance me and move me forward and you have a great mindset in terms of always trying not to be stuck and seeing that as almost like a big failure so really really acknowledge you for that so in terms of imposter syndrome you mentioned that every single person suffers with this on I’ve definitely suffered with it myself even before I started this podcast I used to listen to the podcast for about four or five years enough though there is no way I could ever become a podcast host I used to listen to some really really excited individuals some extra that some guys that would just literally made for radio presented and I thought well I’m gonna be quiet I’m gonna be a little bit more reserve them to be more emotional in my podcast because I like great stories and I always like to find dive into somebody’s life if that makes sense in a meaningful conversations but how to overcome the I have to put that aside and believe in myself but like yourself so when I started writing in my journals I start thinking well actually my positives all dis my post is about and maybe somebody wants to head out on for nearly enough people do want to hear it people teaching in an obviously have Amazing Stories that yes also thank you for sharing that I’m on a plus single men have you got any tips maybe that their listeners could potentially use will say to themselves I mean what do you do when you feel that moment of I’m not sure if I’m good enough fair if I should do this well (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) I mean first of all like realize that this is something that happens to everybody and (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) when you get these thoughts I mean when I get these thoughts you know Dan I’ve come to a point where I can just realized that I’m having these thoughts but I don’t start freaking out about that yeah (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) you don’t get this I I don’t going to some kind of a place where I’m like her less but they thought that oh my god I am not able to do it is what where they thinking when they gave me this job or things like that you know (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) I just realized by now that sometimes distorts and when they come into my head then I just note that they are there and I let them pass and I do not react on them so or if I react on them then at least you know I also noticed that I do it and it’s it’s it’s a point where I can really kind of stop this reaction rather than just it’s spinning off you know and take me to all kind of whiplash absolutely I’ve definitely had those moments from what those have done exactly that so I’m just gonna quit every cop that then so best point which I think is brilliant is to recognize that happens to every single person the second one which I love is just don’t freak out let’s not freak out songs I let’s not just us outside and in the final one which I think is probably the most important one is something that actually takes a bit of work especially for myself is to be mindful of your thoughts and to recognize them and then let them pass so one of the things I realized and I was interviewed a lady and she was speaking about this and it’s one of those things you hear it so many times but maybe the tenth time of the twentieth time here it makes sense like you just said any clicks I want you said it was about your thoughts not being you and effectively what that means is when you are angry that doesn’t mean you’re necessarily nine repay said what you’re doing is you’re just experiencing some emotions of anger we thinking about something that may make you angry and it’s about acknowledging the store it’s almost as if you’re looking at it from an out of body experience not touching your whole self worth and your personality to that and just be mine for that okay this is calm night I need it to paas because obviously I need to move forward in my life so just moving on then you got some great habits as some almost sounding so simple yet so effective and this is what I was trying to say because people always looking for that golden nugget to instantly change a lot and sometimes it is as simple as having two or three simple techniques that you can just run a daily basis do you have any other recommendations on like a daily basis say for women you may be struggling with that confidence or even for the guys are listening to the show as well so I am something dads I also experienced ones that I it was also due to this imposter syndrome feeling that I had I felt like I had to behave like somebody else you know like (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) the idea that I had of a person in that position how that person would dress how that person would behave I’m in at some point I realized that I was just trying so hard to be somebody else and not really trying to be myself at all (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) so one thing that really (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) made a change in my life and (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) to sound stupid but I realize that my favorite clothes in the world our skirts and dresses and they make me feel confident and good when I wear them and I know it and I look good when I wear them so that gives me confidence so I started wearing only skirts to work like that’s a ninety seven percent of the time I’m wearing only skirts and they make me feel really confident and because I eat I feel pretty and I feel you know yeah really good absolutely just my clothing so this is something that (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) I realized and this is something you know that maybe for everybody else can also be useful because you might be in a job where you feel like you need to dress up in in the business outfit the whatever but you can still probably makes changes to dads and tweak it so that it suits your personality more and you don’t have to you know blend in with the crowd that can actually express a little bit of who you are I think that is such a burden on science doesn’t sound stupid by the way such Lee something dot is the underlying theme for the show so this show is about finding your voice and the important where that is your so often in life we do the things that we think are expected of us or what people expect from us and you almost lose ourselves in that moment and I’ve been there I’ve been in corporate I’ve been in other roles way I’m dressing in a way that I don’t feel comfortable so when you was talking about that I was not in my head because you want to dress so you feel comfortable so you for happy so you actually feel pretty (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) as a guy handsome or however you want to feel empowered I think that is such an important point and again it’s so simple yet we forget the simple things because we’re trying to adapt to the external noise that we often having something that is such a an incredible point not behaving like somebody else is not going to save you we need to start to behave like ourselves in order to make ourselves have that confidence to overcome those dice and almost just be ourselves because I’m not sure about you but one of the things I recognized is the more I become myself the less energy I waste in terms of negative thoughts on it’s just so much easier to be yourself and not have that mask of having to be somebody else so I’m self employed and I have been for four years I feel comfortable in not my best when I have a hoodie on and a house in tracksuit bottoms on and I’m just nice and comfortable so I can be in and out of the gym Michelangelo on to my laptop I even go to meetings with investors like this and sometimes I will get the odd common light is not professional said when I work with people I went with them because of me I’m not going to put on it is fake facade of wearing the C. attended I’m something I’m not this is actually me nine times out of ten and I have to be congruent with myself so a message to anyone out there I think if you are congruent with yourself your messages your words DOT is going to translate itself and people are going to either warm to you or not and either way at least for yourself so I think that’s a really important point as a thank you for sharing that patina exactly it’s so true what you’re saying especially part of wasting your energy you know I mean if you try to be somebody else if you think too much about how you should behave you are wasting so much energy and I mean this is especially at a topic probably for women more than than four man because we have to think about you know how much makeup to put on and work like high heels no high heels you know (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) how long or short can this good B. and all these kind of things you know is this loud maybe a little bit too transparent or you know a bit too low cut you know all these things M. did you have in your mind you know so (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) it is this can waste so much of your engine if at some point you just decide you know I mean this is is my style like my site is wearing skirts of course I’m not wearing mini skirts to work and that would be not suitable but you know then you can at least find a like a range where you can we did the typical (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) makes a dress code that you have to do it yes I mean just quickly going back to my point I don’t want people to start wearing tracksuits every single day of the week I mean I mean what I mean by that is my life is quite flexible enough hi control I. D. but of course if I’m going to a wedding for example I just expanded still recovering from the wedding on the weekend I’m not gonna turn up that in a hoodie I’m obviously dressing up in a seat so I can just be mindful of the audience that you arrived and obviously that’s going to be important but even in that moment try and be comfortable trying not to be like the people around you I think that’s that’s the main message that we’re both trying to convey here exactly so let’s take this a little bit more personal than if I may then so you’re doing the corporate now you’re helping people you’re helping women really get what they deserve you helping people find their voice and being themselves well I want to do is I’m gonna delve a little bit into your life now you briefly touched on a time of adversity when you’re going through something I think with your father that you mention it doesn’t need to necessarily be that what I want to do from this part of the show Patino is to ask you about time of adversity and it could be absolutely anytime and the reason I want to ask you about this time is because (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) eighty one just explain D. adversity because I’m pretty said somebody somewhere listening has been through something similar but secondly what was the lesson dot dot adversity taught you in hindsight so I have struggled a lot with migraines ever since I was a kid and it got pretty pretty bad during that time (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) when my dad was sick but also before (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) I had times with me chronic migraines and that’s like ten to fifteen days a month so basically every other day and migrants are really not a normal headache so (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) for everybody who’s never experienced this is remembering the debilitating because you have (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) this strong I mean in your head but also you’re very sensitive to light or to noise or two smells or anything that that might irritate you you get very irritable and (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) you might feel nauseous (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) you might need to lie down in the completely darkroom and and do nothing so that was obviously a very hard time for me because I could not stay away from work ten or fifteen days a month and that’s just not possible so I was always I’m trying to push through and then seeing doctors and trying different medications and so on until I I got to a point where you know the I I felt like I had I was a victim of of these migrants like they were completely ruling my life and I had no choice anymore in what I wanted to do you know I I couldn’t I felt like I could not set anything up with friends or plan any trips or whatever because I was always afraid that you know and you might have to cancel because (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) of my migrants and at some point this was also really thanks to podcasts that I listen to I realized that I let the migraines define me and at that point I decided that I was not going to be a victim of my migraines anymore now I was not gonna be dis this victim M. who always has to take care of not doing this and not doing that then watching hours and so on and so on not eating what you like or not having a glass of wine when you feel like it and and things like that so I just decided really it sounds simple but I just decided that I was not going to be a victim of my magnets and more so this is also something that my journaling actually help me with because I started my gratitude I’m part of the journaling always with I am grateful for not having a migrant and at some point I realized that for like two or three months in a row every day I had written I didn’t have a migraine you know and so somehow since then since this since I started to the journaling went since I started you know changing my mindset towards them how I was feeling dead migrants got much much less you know so I think of course not every disease can be cured by a change of mindset but in my case it really helped me to change my mindset from feeling victimized to saying okay I don’t care you know I it’s my life and I’m going to live my life the way I want it absolutely absolutely so one of the things that you did was you became almost a victim you consider yourself a victim you start to initially allowed this to define you and as a result a affected your life effected the things that you would doing the things that you could look forward to in terms of going out so I love that decision dot you said I’m no longer going to be a victim of this and very similar to yourself one of the things I always suffered with is I always have a cold so I have quite a nasally voice that some people say so I would be having a tissue in my hand probably six of the seven days of the week I’m known for always having two issues always having a cold and initially that stop to live my life as well because I would be anxious and nervous about going to networking events in case I start sneezing on people get annoyed by me I was scared to stop podcasting case I had an appointment booked in the north of the set an alarm to able to do the podcast and I had all these things the same as yourself that would actually affect my life and then I made the same decision I said I’m no longer going to be this individual who is having to change his life because of something that at this point in time a call control and as a result of that I started very separate yourself I feel like we’ve lived almost a similar kind of life where I started right off emissions I started doing Jennings and some simple things I used to say like I’m gonna be healthy and fit today I will no longer have to cancel shows because of my nose I just these little things and I can’t explain it but I hardly get a word out like already have a teach you all me I think that just changed so must have been the last six months so when you set up the end you’re not saying it can Q. R. V. illness I I agree I’m not saying that if you just listen to me but you know what this episode yet we’re gonna cure or your illnesses but what I will say negative thoughts can actually have an impact on you so there’s no actual science behind a positive thought but what they do say is negative thoughts con negatively impact you (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) so most often or not they were explaining that most people when they die is they tend to give up or something negative in the life for example if the been diagnosed with cancer it’s not negative emotion that tends to make them almost give up where is if you can just remain positive in that moment and not let those negative thoughts Coleman you cannot you keep going you can actually keep going and like yourself now you’ve gone days without having a migraine on the same days without having to code so that was a bit of a rumble I apologize for anyone let’s say is that it is so true I mean you know the moment you change your mind set you also change the way you behave you know I mean in my case I changed my lifestyle you know and just of my diet I decided K. I am not so affected by this anymore so I will be more active I will do I will go hiking for example or do dumb sports which usually I I feel like we’re giving mag right migraines but I thought you know you need to you need to do at least you know a little bit you know and I just tried to behave differently of course I did not make the decision I wasn’t going to be a victim anymore and then keep everything the same because that alone probably would not have changed it absolutely absolutely I did I did the same things I’ve tried to change my lifestyle in fact I even took it a step further where me and the wife now we’re in the process of creating a new business and we’re gonna crazy perfume blends and I thought I’m gonna have the greatest ingredients on the market for affordable convenient price and I’m gonna not only give these to other people who may benefit from them but I’m gonna take it myself it’s almost kind of made my (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) medicine because I’m just so tired of always being cold so I think we have the ability to control our future we have the ability to control our present but what we have to do is let you touched on L. F. U. moments ago is we have to make that decision I saw some important so thank you for sharing that and on that note we are going to do is we’re gonna segue into what I call the phone part of the show so I do apologize Bettina because you got to go for the same kind of questions again so whenever you’re ready I’m gonna start the timer all right okay we’re gonna go in three to one okay your favorite hobby anything outside your biggest mistake last year watching too much Netflix I think that’s my biggest mistake this year at the minute still going on sometimes yeah absolutely okay your proudest achievement how does that shipment while I’m actually dead I started my own business this is something I never would have thought about even five years ago I love that if you had an extra hour a day how would you spend it I would probably be more active because (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) like exercising because this is what always gets dropped if I don’t have enough time the best less than anyone has ever told you I love this quote from Steve Jobs where he says you know you cannot connect the dots looking forward you can only connect them looking backwards and then (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) basically D. would make sense and you just have to trust that everything will work out this is basically that lessen the mind opening a lesson that I had absolutely if you could get the listeners to practice one thing to benefit their mindset started today what would it be it’s the five minute journal of that why you seek legal dot not nobody knows (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) lots of crafty things what would you like to be remembered for (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) for being a good person and helping people your favorite color purple I’m a terrible person so you know they say people who loved purple (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) said there are no other colors food so that’s me so now we’re gonna segue into the final part of the show so the next question is about reflection Bettina one of the things I believe in is that hindsight is an incredible thing because upon reflection we can always think of ways to get to where we are currently quicker easier and definitely with less heartache but at the same time I believe the Janie teaches us so much as well and the everything I suppose happens for a reason so what I want to know is if you could maybe go back in time to one moment where you struggled maybe with your confidence I just whisper something in the younger Mateen as a knowing exactly what you know now what would you say I would say that you are not too weird I’m not as weird as you feel it because everybody is doubting themselves and nobody is as confident as they seem so don’t let this hold you back and don’t let it make you feel small I love that and you are certainly not weights I don’t ever think that yeah well if you’ll read I’m sure (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) which I’m sure we’ve all got our little widow quickie tries but that’s what makes us unique so it that’s absolutely fine I’m just finally then suddenly we are at the last question and the last question is about legacy so if a hundred fifty years time songs bells to save us and all that exists is a book and this book is about you it’s about your life it’s about the incredible things that you’ve achieved and done first of all we know is what would the title of this book be and secondly over the summer at the back tell us about you so the title would be how to be successful without the master plan and the summary would say something like you don’t need to have it all figured out it’s a in fact impossible to have it all figured out and you just need to realize what your strengths are and trust your gut and take action and go for the things that you want to achieve and you will get there absolutely that’s fantastic advice there by Bettina so before I close the show and give you a chance to let the audience follow you hope you on your journey and learn more from yourself as well are there any questions that you may be wish I’d asked you or is there anything else that you want to leave the audience with I really only one (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) you know let everybody know that yet if you are struggling with confidence this is normal everybody’s doing it just reinforces I think we have covered all the important parts (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) to talk about this and if anybody really (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) need any particular help I’m like for example to identify your own strings or you know just try to get over a certain part that is troubling when you really you know doubting yourself a lot you can always get help from someone can be me or somebody else but you know there’s always a way to get over that absolutely absolutely I have one hundred percent agree with all of that so what is the best place people can follow you so I have a website which is called women’s career lift dot com (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) you can also find me on Instagram at women’s career live or on my Facebook page was also women’s career list and you can also find me on linked in (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) but for linked in your best go to my website and click on the button in the bottom (subscribe to find your voice to build your confidence & avoid imposter syndrome) to take you to my linked in profile because my last name is hard to spell which is why I’ve been calling you by your first name for the home is my decision absolutely I do want to buy the stuff you live on the show but I encourage every single listener of this to you follow between it because what she’s doing is in the midst of or have had confidence issues or all of the imposter syndrome that she goes through in fact that we all go through she still going out there achieving the dream’s tackling the things that initially scared and going out there and find an invoice so but Tina thank you so much for coming on the second time subsidy been a joy I’ve really really enjoyed this I’m for everyone else on hold thank you so much for listening thank you so much for having me and remember this podcast is absolutely free so all we ask in return is for you to share this with a friend and drop us a five star review over on iTunes have an awesome day

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